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Gardner Dozois NOT in a Coma

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Mark Becker
Posted on Saturday, September 04, 2004 - 08:21 pm:   

From the Speculations forum:

"Gardner Dozois, award-winning writer and longtime editor of Asimov's Science Fiction, slipped into a coma today after complications during recent shoulder surgery. No more information is available at this time, but we do plan to keep you updated on his condition. Please send out your prayers to Gardner and his family."

This is awful news, and I hope he recovers fully. Please keep him in your thoughts.
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ca mcgee
Posted on Sunday, September 05, 2004 - 12:24 am:   

From the Asimov's board:

By Gardner Dozois on Sunday, September 05, 2004 - 02:37 am:


This is not true, I am not in a coma, or not any more of a one than I usually am, anyway. It is true that I broke my shoulder rather badly in a car accident, but the coma part is not true, and I'd appreciate someone passing that message on to SPECULATIONS.

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KS
Posted on Sunday, September 05, 2004 - 07:22 am:   

Um... I don't think there's anything about Gardner's presumed coma on Speculations. Maybe a different site?
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BANDWIDTH EATER
Posted on Sunday, September 05, 2004 - 07:32 am:   

No, I was just fucking around. No coma, no message on Speculations. You people are no fun. I had those dumb shits at the Asimov's board worried as hell.
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Gardner Dozois
Posted on Sunday, September 05, 2004 - 05:47 pm:   

Very droll, Bandwidth Eater. I hope somebody does something similar for you one of these days.
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Bob Urell
Posted on Monday, September 06, 2004 - 04:26 am:   

Kee-rist. What a jackass.
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Kage Baker
Posted on Monday, September 06, 2004 - 04:01 pm:   

Hey, Gardner, get well soon. You need that shoulder if you're going to continue holding up the cosmos.

We missed you at Noreascon.
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Lucius
Posted on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 - 07:35 am:   

Gardner,

Hurry up and get well in time for mud wrestling at WFC. :-)
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Gardner Dozois
Posted on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 - 04:07 pm:   

NUDE mud wrestling, I assume (although I'd rather take on Ellen or Kage). I might have an unfair advantage with my keen new Bionic Shoulder.
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chance
Posted on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 - 05:28 pm:   

woo! *buys front row seat*

*and a waterproof camera*
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Kage Baker
Posted on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 - 06:57 pm:   

Cyborg wrestling, is it? Pish. The REAL challenge for a bionic shoulder is...

CONVENT SCHOOL BADMINTON.

So let me throw down the gauntlet, Gardner-- I will meet you anywhere, on any court, in the navy blue woolen parochial school uniform of your choice, though I'd advise against plaid pleated skirts.

I can hear it now-- the thunder of saddle oxfords, the jangle of rosaries, the screams of anguish as shuttlecocks impact on horn-rimmed spectacles...
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EDatlow
Posted on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 - 08:19 pm:   

Whoopie!!!!!!!!!!!
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MarcL
Posted on Wednesday, September 08, 2004 - 09:19 am:   

That's not mud. It's chocolate pudding.

Nude Convent School Pudding Beach Badminton is the true sport of sports.
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Neal Stanifer
Posted on Thursday, September 09, 2004 - 08:14 am:   

But where do the dwarves come in? There must be dwarves.
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MarcL
Posted on Thursday, September 09, 2004 - 08:43 am:   

Gardner is dwarf writ large.
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JV
Posted on Thursday, September 09, 2004 - 09:46 am:   

God--really glad to hear this isn't true. Wish I hadn't been at WorldCon--could have checked this thread and nipped that bastard in the bud.

Anyway, Gardner--glad to hear you are recovering. Sorry you missed WorldCon.

Best,

JeffV
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Minz
Posted on Thursday, September 09, 2004 - 12:25 pm:   

JV: I, along with many other folks, were very glad you and Ann were at Worldcon, Gardner hoaxes be damned. Much better that we could keep an eye on you (and keep you out of Frances' Eye.) Now start growing back that beard so we'll recognize you the next time . . .

Gardner, while it actually goes without saying, I'll say it anyway: you were sorely missed at Worldcon, and as much as I adore Jack Dann, it's just not a Worldcon without watching Gardner pick up some hardware. Get well soon.
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Jayme Blaschke
Posted on Friday, September 10, 2004 - 10:34 am:   

Ah, I miss all the fun. Here I'd heard Gardner slipped into a "comma," and just assumed that's what editors do after leaving a magazine they'd edited for decades. Punctuationally, you know. :-)

Anyway, best wishes with the recovery, comma or no.

Jayme Lynn Blaschke
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JV
Posted on Friday, September 10, 2004 - 01:57 pm:   

Hey, Jim! It was nice to see you here and there. Next time, it should be for a longer time, and I'm buyin. I still owe you a drink from NY. (Hope you got Secret Life.)

Also, I've changed the title of this thread because I thought it might be misleading otherwise. Hope no one minds. I'm sure Gardner won't...

Jeff
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Melissa Mead
Posted on Friday, September 10, 2004 - 02:29 pm:   

Minz, from the sound of things, he WAS picking up some hardware. Trouble is, it was the nasty surgical kind.

Hope you feel better soon, Mr. Dozois.
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Gardner Dozois
Posted on Friday, September 10, 2004 - 05:55 pm:   

Hey, slipping into a comma doesn't sound so bad; I've always liked commas...

Thanks for all your good wishes, folks!
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Bob Urell
Posted on Saturday, September 11, 2004 - 08:25 am:   

He says he likes commas, and yet he uses a semicolon to say it. Methinks the writer doth protest too much.
One more good wish to the pot, Gardner. Now you can make a stew....
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EDatlow
Posted on Saturday, September 11, 2004 - 09:13 am:   

commas good. comas bad.
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Neal Stanifer
Posted on Saturday, September 11, 2004 - 03:42 pm:   

Bob, of course he used a semicolon. Only the editor of a *British* magazine would have the unmitigated cheek to join two independent clauses with a mere comma. The semicolon is more American; it says "halt" in THUNDER!
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Bob Urell
Posted on Saturday, September 11, 2004 - 07:35 pm:   

Ah. So what you're saying is, Gardner, with his thunderous punctuation and his mating of independent clauses, is compensating for something. Good to know.
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John Thiel
Posted on Thursday, November 04, 2004 - 07:53 am:   

Turns out Yasir Arafat is in that coma.

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