|Posted on Thursday, August 14, 2003 - 07:11 am: |
I am trying to develop a bonsai version of the sport of BASE jumping. You have to jump from the following elevations: (a) basket (b) asparagus (c) stilton (d) envelope, clutching only a handkerchief!
I wonder if anyone else has any alternative (and possibly superior) elevations for this sport?
I'm making a pot of tea now, and I can't possibly drink it all. Would anyone like some?
Jason Erik Lundberg
|Posted on Thursday, August 14, 2003 - 07:24 am: |
I'll take some, Rhys, as long as it contains caffeine. And after the envelope, I'd base jump to a dust speck, though it might flatten the speck in question.
|Posted on Thursday, August 14, 2003 - 08:28 am: |
A bonsai version of the hundred meter dash would also be welcome -- the half meter dash, or "50 Centimeters to Glory!".
It's just the sort of exercise I'd be good at, too.
|Posted on Friday, August 15, 2003 - 03:15 am: |
I heard you are good at wrestling baby squid, Gabe! That's a sort of bonsai Jules Verne thing, I reckon!
|Posted on Friday, August 15, 2003 - 08:32 am: |
And then I eat them. Preferably stewed in their own ink.
|Posted on Friday, August 15, 2003 - 01:53 pm: |
In honor of the running of the bulls in Pamplona I also sponsor a bonsai version called the running of the snails, after which the little creatures are made into escargot.
|Posted on Friday, August 22, 2003 - 07:13 am: |
Seized by inspiration, I performed a spontaneous base jump from a large manila envelope (used).
Not to be outdone, the cat followed me.
I've never felt so alive!
Next stop: the carpet!
|Posted on Friday, August 22, 2003 - 07:35 am: |
I've discovered that reversing the direction of the bonsai base-jump doesn't work so well. I am convalescing after leaping from a gutter to the lip of a handicap access ramp. Do NOT try this at home! Next time, I'll stick to the scrap of Kleenex I used for practice jumps.
But at least my injuries have given me some time to work the kinks out of my idea for Extreme Knitting.
|Posted on Friday, August 22, 2003 - 08:49 am: |
Amateur. Clearly you should have toothpick-vaulted.
|Posted on Tuesday, March 29, 2005 - 03:55 am: |
Here's a game even sadder than Bonsai Base Jumping.
It involves looking at Night Shade's discussion board (the main page) and pretending the number of messages left for each writer is the year that person is living in.
For instance, Jeffrey Ford is currently living in 1966. This is the year that the following events happened:
* Laker Airways founded
* The Rolling Stones banned from 14 New York hotels
* Frank Sinatra and Mia Farrow married
* Cassius Clay beats Henry Cooper
* Graham Hill wins Indy 500 at first attempt
* The first British credit card 'The Barclaycard' is introduced in the UK
* The Kray twins shoot George Cornell in the 'Blind Beggar Pub'
* Star Trek premiered on NBC
Obviously as more messages are added to the boards, the writer involved will move forward in time...