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Bloodrayne

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Bob K.
Posted on Friday, January 20, 2006 - 10:21 pm:   

http://www.electricstory.com/reviews/review.aspx?title=new/bloodrayne

Suck it up.

Bob
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Nathan
Posted on Friday, January 20, 2006 - 11:09 pm:   

Okay, I'm sold. I've got to check this guy out. I'm renting HOUSE OF THE DEAD tomorrow.
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PM
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 05:37 am:   

Poor Lucius.

The things you do for art and a paycheck.

Well Bloodrayne was duly undeserving of your words but I suppose the film can gain some solace that it gather more words than Aeon Flux.

Here's a thought. As new "genre" movies continue to strain one's ability to say "shit" is there any interest in discussing DVD releases?

I enjoy the savagery but perhaps opening up the discussion to "genre" films that are on DVD would allow an opportunity to discuss enjoyable films. These might be lesser known gems...
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Lucius
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 07:51 am:   

I have had several columns which deal with DVD releases, but you can't do that but now and again. Gordon has a philosophy that we do the best movie available in the theaters. This month, the only one that met the qualifications was Bloodrayne. For the reviews I do for ES, there's more leeway, and I expect I'll do another DVD reveiw soon.
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PM
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 08:46 am:   

I hope that we'd all agree that there's been month after month of 'shit' movies in theaters. 'Shit' is actually too good a word.

Far be it from me to tell Gordon how to run his magazine though :-)

But if the movies in theaters aren't worthy of words then perhaps opening up the discussion to DVDs or tv shows provides something worth reviewing.

So this isn't a criticism aimed at Lucius, ES, or Gordon. And the review is as always well done and worth reading. But my god man, Bloodrayne!!!
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Lucius
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 08:57 am:   

Actually I thought Uwe Boll's justification for making movies was interesting because, even though Hwood turns up their noses at his work, the work is less a perversion of the Hwood ethic than a slight extrapolation of it.
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ben peek
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 01:56 pm:   

...you know, part of me wants to see that now. at least for masden. might be a wait for tv thing, i think.
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PM
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 02:02 pm:   

Yes it is interesting.

And you're to be commended and/or damned for discussing a filmmaker whose work is beyond reproachable. Of course as you've written there may be hope that this will change.

Certainly wretched films will continue to be made. But it's ever so disappointing that these films gain recognition by simply being in theaters. And thus get reviewed by default.

And then creates a burden for reviewers. Some folk will criticize Lucius for being "negative" but his task is very much an exercise in making something out of nothing.
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Lucius
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 02:27 pm:   

Madsen will want to drink more if he ever sees this, Ben.
PM, we do what we can...
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Stephen
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 02:44 pm:   

Don't you have access to good alternative theaters?
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PM
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 02:48 pm:   

My guess is that at least some will check out Bloodrayne for Loken's body and breasts...
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Lucius
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 04:07 pm:   

Stephen, if you know of an alternative fantasy of scfi movie opening in Jan, I'd like to know what it is?
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Robert
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 05:24 pm:   

Any inserts of video game footage in this one? That really made House of the Dead - at random points in the movie, there were shots from the actual game. They didn't further the story or have any point, other than to remind people it was based on a game.

Bloodrayne didn't even open in Pittsburgh. I'm not disappointed, I you'd need to pay me to see another Boll movie.
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Lucius
Posted on Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 05:54 pm:   

No inserts, but those in house of the dead were special.

No Pittsburgh, but it opened in a thousand theaters nationwide...More than Boll had a right to expect.

Actually, I found it fairly amusing. It's better than HOTD, and Madsen and Kingsley and Zane and Meat Loaf were pretty funny.
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PM
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 06:41 am:   

Well I suppose this vindicates those critics who proclaimed WOTW to be a classic compared to its recent peers.

There will always be films that thud and anchor.

It's saddening though that this is all we're getting for 'genre' films.

And there doesn't seem to be anything that can be done to correct it. People will go see what's on simply because they want to see a movie. This ensures profitability and the 'shit' cycle continues. I know I do it.

I was thinking about 'genre' films for 2005 and there was nothing.

Which leads to the subversion of the enjoyment of film. There's a place for MST3K. But one begins to wonder if 'genre' films aren't targeting MST3K...
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Lucius
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 06:49 am:   

there were a number of decent genre films in 2005, but they were all indie or foreign
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Mastadge
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 11:52 am:   

My guess is that at least some will check out Bloodrayne for Loken's body and breasts...

You mean her breats?
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PM
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 01:33 pm:   

Well I won't be bleating about them...

The "breats" that is.

She's not so decent but perhaps someone will toss out a list (not so much a ranking because "ranking" is oh so Hollywood) of 2k5's decent genre films.

I know...I'm a fuckin' grifter :-)
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Lucius
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 01:46 pm:   

A list of the best genre films? Okay. Here's one:








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Stephen
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 02:21 pm:   

Lucius, I have no idea. I figured you'd know.

Good list. :-)

Anyway, I understand why the reviews for F&SF need to be fantasy and sci-fi, but only half of them go in there. So does it need to be always?
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Lucius
Posted on Sunday, January 22, 2006 - 02:52 pm:   

Lately I've just been doing F&SF reviews--I have a heavy work load, but I'd like to do a DVD review, so maybe I will.
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PM
Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 07:39 pm:   

I understand that you work hard at what you do and your work is appreciated.

This is no insult toward the publications either but it's about damn time reviewers started saying nothing.

I want to see Ebert/Roeper just sit quietly in their chairs twiddling their thumbs.

How about if Rolling Stone and Time have nothing to say?

How about those quotes that they insist on slapping on every trailer saying, "The critics are unanimous. They had nothing to say."

Alright it'll never happen.

But a nice blank page would be a start...
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Lucius
Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 08:29 pm:   

I like to see Punch and Ebert twiddling in electrtc chairs.
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PM
Posted on Monday, January 23, 2006 - 09:04 pm:   

How about a firing squad for studio execs, producers, and directors?

We'll leave the actors for the made for tv movie...

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